- You don’t like your lover to offer tips
Lovers often ignore the important discussion in the room”Elephant in the room”
The longer you avoid it, the bigger impact it will have. It is important to tell your lover what you like or want sexually.
It is important to be open to your lover’s suggestion. Listen and respect their ideas instead of getting mad or upset.
- You’re a distracted lover
A sign of good sex is being totally in the moment(mind and body)
Don’t leave your phone on. Don’t check email, Don’t text. If your mind wanders, zero in on how you’re being touched or refocus on your breathing.
- You don’t give and take
It’s best to give and to receive. “Sexual pleasure requires balancing selfishness with unselfish given”
- You make love on Automatic Pilot
If your lover can predict your every move, you may both be missing out.
Freshen up your sex menu. Your brain loves new things.
You can get to your usual script eventually, but for the first third of sex play, start with something more exciting.
Examples like talking dirty to each other or trying new sex positions.
- You don’t guide your lover
Being a good lover is being a good communicator.
If you are totally still and silent, your partner can’t get much sense of what pleases you .
Use your words, your sounds and your movements to help your partner know what you’d like more or less of.
- When your ideas of good sex are based on porn
Porn can put you in the mood or teach you new techniques. But define good sex by what’s happening in your own bed. Explore your partner.
Get to know their body, breathing, and muscle tension. The more you relax and see what works for each other, the more you’ll naturally develop a great sex life.